In this movie, Obi Wan Kenobi and Count Dracula vie for the hand of the lovely courtesan who is dying of consumption, whilst lipsyncing more than a battalion of drag-queens. Not that there are any drag-queens in the movie, unless you count that one scene where the midget is dressed like a nun. So knock a star off the final score for no drag queens, but put it back up there for midgets. Hurray for midgets!
Where were we, oh yeah, so Obi Wan woos Nicole Kidman by lipsynching to pop music and Rogers & Hammerstein show tunes (but he's totally strait), while Dracula offers wealth and fame and exudes more creepy perviness than a phalanx of chicken-rapists. Which begs the question, who would win in a fight, Obi Wan, or Dracula? but the question just hangs over the show like the fscking Sword of Damocles, while Nicole pulls a Mimi and dies in the end, but not before professing her love for Obi Wan.
I just can't wait for the sequel Moulin Rouge II, Revenge of Puccini. Where Puccini and Murger come back as zombies kill the writers, and beat Baz Luhrmann to a bloody pulp while lipsynching to Lady Gaga songs and juggling flaming chickens.
Oh, and watch Moulin Rouge in the mean-time, it's actually a pretty fun show.
Where were we, oh yeah, so Obi Wan woos Nicole Kidman by lipsynching to pop music and Rogers & Hammerstein show tunes (but he's totally strait), while Dracula offers wealth and fame and exudes more creepy perviness than a phalanx of chicken-rapists. Which begs the question, who would win in a fight, Obi Wan, or Dracula? but the question just hangs over the show like the fscking Sword of Damocles, while Nicole pulls a Mimi and dies in the end, but not before professing her love for Obi Wan.
I just can't wait for the sequel Moulin Rouge II, Revenge of Puccini. Where Puccini and Murger come back as zombies kill the writers, and beat Baz Luhrmann to a bloody pulp while lipsynching to Lady Gaga songs and juggling flaming chickens.
Oh, and watch Moulin Rouge in the mean-time, it's actually a pretty fun show.
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